So yesterday I was hoping to surprise the wife with a film date seeing has we were both in town for eye tests. I said surprise however; I first needed to make sure she was carrying her CEA card. I checked her purse and it was nowhere so I had to ask where it was so spoiling my planned surprise.
The card allows a disabled person to take a carer in free for a yearly registration fee of £6 plus a photo, which entitles you to reduced admission to cinemas. Which meant our trip cost us £2.50 each on a shared bases.
We were early for out test and while sitting around outside waiting and who popped up in my line of view… friend Gillian. We had a chat and then Dad just appeared out of nowhere. I got the all clear on my eyes, which have improved a nice surprise but I still need glasses.
I had it in mind to go to Premier Cinema it was the closes to our opticians but first I was not too happy with the disability facilities you had to press for assistance to get in for wheelchair users. And the next film was My Cousin Rachel, which I declared a non-event and the wife gave the thumbs down to Transformers: The Last Knight so we decided to wander to Cineworld were we would have more choice.
There was a lot more on offer a Cineworld. I was hoping for The Mummy or Wonder Woman but neither were showing until later but there was an action film on offer, yes you can guess, Transformers. With a bit of pressure I got my way and Transformers it was going to be. I owe the wife a film, a chicky film and hopefully my plus one reserve her friend Karen could go in my place.
I love the cinema in the afternoon as they are always nearly empty and besides us, there will five other people in the theatre.
On the screen was the reported final instalment of this franchise, which I must say is getting tiresome now. To prove the point the film opens in the Dark Ages as King Arthur and Lancelot are preparing to enter a brutal battle against the Saxons.
The battle is not going Arthur’s way as he waits on Merlin to materialize with some magical surprise that could be of the metal kind. When Merlin finally turns up it is with a three-headed metal dragon, which vanquishes the Saxon army, and he returns with a newly acquired magic staff of some importance. Remember the round table and the knights well I bet you do not remember the twelve Transformer Knights of the Round Table.
Bang and we are back to the present day and the Transformers are no longer allies, humanity in the guise of the Transformer Reaction Force (TRF) who are now hunting them down and destroying them worldwide but for Cuba where they are free to frolic on the beach. Cade Yeager (Mark Wahlberg) is still team Transformers hiding them in his junkyard with the TRF on his trail. Where is Optimus Prime? Floating through space to home world, Cybertron where he meets a sorceress named Quintessa Prime who is on a mission to find the magic staff, turns Prime to a badie, and is rename Nemesis Prime by the sorceress.
The Eye Candy |
We learn the Transformers have been around for centuries helping worthy causes for humankind – including helping to destroy the Nazis in World War II. How they remained hidden to the general public all these years is never really explained. I mean they are somewhat hard to miss and they do substantial damage when engaged.
This is only the leading edge of a plot involving an ancient secret society, headed by Lord Sir Edmund Burton (Sir Anthony Hopkins). Surely, he must have been in the film for a payday. He is also on the lookout for the magic staff and sends his butler come robot Cogman to the USA to bring Yeager to England where he joins up with a sexy upper-crust professor Viviane Wembley (Laura Haddock) the eye candy. We find Wembley is a descendant of Merlin and can wheeled the magic staff and stop Quintessa Prime plans to destroy earth to make a new home world for the Transformers.
Fleeing the TRF who followed Yeager to England he and Wembley follow clues left by the latter's father that lead them, Bumblebee, and Cogman to take the submarine HMS Alliance being use as a museum into the sea to find the Cybertronian Knights' sunken ship, in which they discover the tomb of Merlin and the staff.
The rest of the film you can guess there is plenty of crash bang wallop. A devilish car chase with Transformers duking it out with earth soldiers fighting their ground bravely. At the final battle around Stonehenge, there is a brief appearance of British Troops and tanks.