Loading the Jukebox 12 - Hey Boy, Hey Girl – Millie Small and Jimmy Cliff

Millie Small is best known for her worldwide hit “My Boy Lollipop”, reaching number two in the UK charts in 1964 but for me its “Hey Boy, Hey Girl” in 1966 featured on the album ‘Ska at the Jamaica Playboy Club’ recorded with Jimmy Cliff that rocks my boat.

It was recommended to me and although I had heard of Millie Small, I hadn’t come across the tune before for some unknown reason. She was born in Jamaica, and like many Jamaican singers of the era, her career began by winning the Vere Johns Opportunity Hour talent contest, the Jamaican Opportunity Knocks.

“Hey Boy, Hey Girl” at the moment is my favourite song on my YouTube play list. I love the upbeat tempo of the song and my favourite version is the duet between Small and reggae legend Jimmy Cliff. This track is a certified toe tapper that makes you what to get up, dance, and grab a partner it makes me wish I could dance. I am a bit unsure if it was released as a single owing to the fact I couldn’t find any chart record but still it is a number one to me.

Must see TV - Week beginning 1 April 2018

Recently I have been struggling with my TV recommendations for new programming but this upcoming week there is an abundance. There is a return of a classic and a favourite of mine “The Generation Game”. I have no idea what to expect but I have a feeling TV pundits are queuing up to trash it with comparisons with past shows and presenters. It’s going to be a busy seven days for my football team with two televised games on Sky Sports.

Saturday 30 Mar – Channel 5 – Most Shocking Sexist TV of All Time 9pm ***New***

Channel 5 loves to programme countdown shows and this time they are countdown to some of television’s most outrageous sexist moments, featuring archive footage, and interviews, and an examination of how gender politics has played out on TV from the 1960s to the present day.

Sunday 1 Apr - Sky One - Revolution 6:30pm ***New Series***

Something new for the youngsters but I can still watch you never know I could get my skateboard out. Steve-O from Jackass and Maya Jama from who knows present an entertainment show in which inline skaters, BMXers and skateboarders go head-to-head in a series of rounds that include high-speed races, an obstacle course, and a high jump competition. Jordan Banjo has all the trackside gossip and Tim Warwood and CK Flash provide the commentary.

Sun 1 Apr – BBC 1 – The Generation Game 8pm ***New Series***

Mel Giedroyc and Sue Perkins host the first of two special episodes reviving the classic game show in which four teams of two family members compete in a series of bizarre challenges, culminating in the famous conveyor belt. Guests Lorraine Kelly, Richard Osman, and Martin Kemp are on the show as the contestants tackle sausage-making, plate spinning, and teapot throwing.

The games, for those too young to remember the original, are designed for maximum embarrassment, and hilarity, so we see contestants attempt to work a pottery wheel (under the surprisingly competent eye of Johnny Vegas), make sausages, and do a Bollywood routine. By the time two teams of family members try plate spinning, everyone is having a smashing time. Yep, that’s the level of it.

Sun 1 Apr – BBC 1 - Ordeal by Innocence 9pm ***New Series***

Three-part adaptation of Agatha Christie's novel, starring Bill Nighy. The former husband of a murdered heiress prepares to remarry 18 months after her adopted son was convicted of killing her, before dying himself in a prison brawl. However, the wedding preparations are disrupted by the arrival of a mysterious scientist who has returned from an expedition to the Arctic - and who claims to be able to prove the supposed murderer is innocent.

Monday 2 Apr – Sky Sports Main Event – Sheffield United v Cardiff City 7:30pm ***New***

Most of my recommendations tonight will have to be seen via catch-up with it being a footy night. All games are important with eight games in the season left, a win, and three points would help on the road to promotion. It is the first game in a tough April for Cardiff City.

Monday 2 Apr – Channel 4 – Travel Man 8:30pm ***New Series***

Richard Ayoade returns with his offbeat tourism show and is joined in the first edition by comedian and ‘Not Going Out’ star, Lee Mack for a short break in the Belgian capital. Their two-day trip features culture, comics, pralines, puppets and attractions both large and small, including the Grand Palace and the famous atom-shaped Atomium, as well as waffles, mussels - including Genghis Khan - and the secrets of chocolate-making.

Monday 2 Apr – Channel 4 - The Island with Bear Grylls 9pm ***New Series***

The survival challenge returns with two separate groups being abandoned at opposite ends of a remote uninhabited island in the Pacific Ocean, with the 16 Islanders facing extreme tropical weather, limited resources, and environmental hazards. One team of castaways consists of professionals living off an average income of £100,000 a year, while the members of the other earn below the UK national average wage. In the first episode, Bear Grylls drops them off in caiman-infested mangroves and deep water. All ready I hate the posh lot.

Monday 2 Apr – BBC 2 – Dave Allen at Peace 9pm ***New Series***

This curiously bio-drama about Dave Allen serves just one purpose, to remind us all of how much we miss the real Dave Allen. Aidan Gillen has a fair stab, and he looks good in a sharp suit, but, of course, only Dave Allen was ever Dave Allen.

Fact-based drama filmed in the style of the Irish comedian's BBC TV series, following Dave Allen from childhood to becoming one of the UK and Ireland's comedy greats, and exploring how his life and work was shaped by the tragic loss of his father, his brother, and half of a finger.

Monday 2 Apr – Channel 4 – Kiss me First 10pm ***New Series***

When her mother dies, Leila has to learn how to manage living on her own and it is only when she logs on to virtual reality game Azana that she feels truly alive. It's there that she meets the mysterious Mania - aka Tess in real life - and discovers a secret paradise called Red Pill, the leader of which tells her she has to be invited to join and blasts her out of the game. However, the next day Leila is stunned when Tess turns up at her workplace. Fantasy thriller blending live action and CGI, starring Tallulah Haddon and Simona Brown.

Tuesday 3 Apr - ITV – Last Laugh in Vegas 9pm ***New Series***

Comedians Cannon and Ball, Bernie Clifton, Kenny Lynch and Mick Miller, join forces with musicians Bobby Crush, Jess Conrad, Anita Harris, and actress Su Pollard to stage their dream gig in Nevada. For two weeks, they will live together, explore the city, and rehearse with Las Vegas producer Frank Marino, preparing for the biggest performance of their lives in one of the area's most iconic theatres.

Tuesday 3 Apr – Fox TV – Wolf Creek 10pm ***New Series***

The return of the thriller, following on from the film franchise of the same name. Mick Taylor sees an opportunity after a chance encounter with a coach full of tourists. The unwitting travellers begin an outback adventure none of them could have imagined. I found the first series gripping hopefully this second series would keep up the high standards.

Tuesday 3 Apr – BBC 2 – Cunk on Britain 10pm ***New Series***

Fresh from her specials on Shakespeare and Christmas, Philomena Cunk, Diane Morgan’s dim-witted presenter, is back with her first full series – a five-part history of Britain. From the days of “Tyrannical Sawdust Rex” to the age of Brexit, she also takes in landmarks like the Bayeux Tapestry – “just like being there but in wool”. Cunk from Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe carries out in-depth investigations, beginning with the big bang. Comedy documentary, starring Diane Morgan, with a guest appearance by Robert Peston.

Tuesday 3 Apr – Discovery Channel – Running Wild With Bear Grylls 10pm ***New Series***

How do you imagine Julia Roberts will manage in the Kenyan bush for a couple of days with Bear Grylls? They’re on an adventure – on behalf of Red Nose Day in the States – to take vital live vaccines to a village that’s far off the beaten track. So with an actual job to do it’s a bit of a milder excursion than some of the celebrity outings we’ve seen before.

But there’s still plenty to enjoy as Julia is forced to confront her fear of heights (she’s got quite some lung power, if she ever wants to do a horror film) and Bear’s less than rudimentary cooking skills. And even if she looks a bit wind-blasted, that fabulous laugh is hard to resist.

Wednesday 4 Apr – BBC 1 – Commonwealth Games: Opening Ceremony 10.30am ***New***

Hazel Irvine presents live coverage from Carrara Stadium, Queensland, Australia, as the 21st staging of the multi-sport event is officially declared open. This is the fifth time Australia has hosted the Games, and the first since Melbourne 2006. At the heart of this ceremony will be the traditional Parade of Nations, the Competitors' Oath and the finale of the Queen's Baton Relay, which has taken place across every nation and territory in the Commonwealth, spanning approximately 150,000 miles.

first events are live on BBC1 from 12.15am. Alistair and Jonny Brownlee compete for England in the men’s triathlon, while Wales captain Non Stanford races in the women’s event.

Thursday 5 Apr – Fox TV – Deep State 9pm ***New Series***

It’s Fox’s first British-made drama, a sprawling international thriller of the kind McMafia wanted to be, but with a lot less about hedge fund managers and shipping lines, mercifully. our hero is Max Easton, an ex-MI6 agent with a guilty secret who has retired to the French countryside to plane furniture and make pancakes for his kids. Well, that won’t last.

Max called out of retirement to clean up a tragic personal angle – but generic in a good way: we know where we are and there’s plenty of it, crammed with twists, baddies and things being blown up. It won’t be dull.

Friday 6 Apr – Sky Sports Football – Cardiff City v Wolves 7pm ***New***

A massive top of the table clash in front of hopefully the biggest crowd of the season and with the game on Sky. Without a crystal ball to see into the future this is an important game for both clubs, a win for Cardiff would see them draw close to the league leaders. In the corresponding fixture at Wolves ground earlier in the season Cardiff won.   

Friday 6 Apr – BBC 1 - The Graham Norton Show 10:35 pm ***New Series***

A married couple join the host, as Emily Blunt, star of The Devil Wears Prada and Girl on a Train, and American Office actor John Krasinski discuss working together in new horror movie A Quiet Place. Kylie Minogue also chats and performs her new single Stop Me from Falling from the album Golden, while Spider-Man star Tom Holland discusses reprising the role for Avengers: Infinity War. Plus, another bunch of intrepid audience members steps up to the plate, willing to recount an anecdote from the dreaded red chair.

Cardiff 3pm Kick-Off for Good Friday

It has been a while since Cardiff City have kicked a ball in anger (17 days) due to the Derby mess and the international break. Now it is the countdown to the end of the season and whatever it holds for the Bluebirds with only nine games left of the official season. Five of those games are away and four at home of course if Cardiff were to find themselves in the Play-offs the season will not be over but I hope that doesn’t happen.

Cardiff are second in the league in an automatic promotion spot seven points ahead of Fulham and Aston Villa and six points behind leaders Wolves with a game in hand. Cardiff are on a bounce of seven wins on a row and take on relegation threaten Burton Albion tomorrow at the Cardiff City Stadium kick-off 3pm.

It should be an easy win but if there is one thing I have learnt is to take nothing for granted in football with Burton like Cardiff having plenty to play for at different ends of the league table.

We have played Burton twice this season already in the EFL Cup second round where they beat Cardiff at the Cardiff City stadium 2-1. A few weeks earlier, the Welshman travelled to Burton for the opening league game of the season and won 1-0 with a late, late Zohore goal.

Games to watch out for

Tomorrow

Norwich v Fulham

Middlesbrough v Wolves

Saturday

Hull City v Aston Villa

The international break saw Aron Gunnarsson have a 45-minute run out for Iceland against Mexico in California after being out since November recovering from ankle surgery. He should return to the match day squad but will boss Neil Warnock risk starting him or place him on the bench. Loan forward Jamie Ward have returned to action for Northern Ireland during the international break playing 62 minutes in Northern Ireland’s impressive 2-1 win over South Korea. Could he be in line for a return to the match day squad?

Goalkeeper Neil Etheridge made the long trip from Manila Philippines where he helped them qualify for the Asian Cup for the first time in their history with a 2-1 win over Tajikistan on Tuesday. It will mean he will now be taking part in the Asian Cup in January next year meaning he will be unavailable for Cardiff.

Craig Bryson could find himself in with a shout of starting, with Loic Damour the man most likely to make way. Joe Ralls (hamstring) remains out and Jazz Richards (ankle) has had a setback in training which will rule him out for another two to three weeks.

March 30th Burton Albion (home)

April 2nd Sheffield United (away) selected for Sky Sports coverage

April 6th Wolves (home) selected for Sky Sports coverage

April 10th Aston Villa (away) selected for Sky Sports coverage

April 14th Norwich (away)

April 21st Nottingham Forest (home) selected for Sky Sports coverage note kick-off Saturday 7:45pm

April 24th Derby County (away)

April 28th Hull City (away)

May 6th Reading (home)

Easter Shopping with the odd Memory

Easter is the only other time of the year we do a big shop the other being Christmas, like then we save towards our spend but nowhere near as much as we do for Christmas, and we only shop in Iceland for this shop anyway. I will need to sort out our freezer for space. I have already ordered a stuffed chicken crown at the butchers for Easter Sunday dinner last week.

Friday being a catholic, it is a no meat day. So for me it will be toast and the main meal will be fish and chips. The decision to be made is will it be fresh fish or take the easy route something from the Iceland freezer ready-made. We could have steam cod and new potatoes whatever it will still be fish and something on the plate. In the end, it was the easy route.

When I was a kid, it was the only time we would see our dad in the kitchen on Good Friday has he made fantastic batter for the fish. I have never been able to recreate it dad never used scales and measurements it was done from memory. Has a catholic there was a trip to church back then which I think was for ‘Stations of the Cross’ or something but all I can remember was the church was next to empty. Good Friday throughout the world commemorates the crucifixion of Jesus who gave his life for the good of everyone. Ok I will play along as I have difficulty in believing.

There are eating rules for Good Friday it is a day for strict fasting and abstinence. Catholics over the age of 18 and under the age of 60 are required to fast, which means that they can eat only one complete meal and two smaller ones during the day, with no food in between. Catholics who are over the age of 14 are required to refrain from eating any meat, or any food made with meat, on Good Friday but its tradition that goes beyond religion lots of family do no meat Fridays.

Another catholic chore was ‘Confession’ not just before Easter Sunday but every Saturday at 12 o’clock. As a kid, I had little to confess so penance was normally two Hail Mary’s, two Our Fathers, and an act of contrition. But growing older meant a bit of juggling with the truth but I always added extra to my penance.

I can guarantee one thing that will not be in our shopping basket! Chocolate in any form but I can guarantee their will be no Easter eggs. Ok the wife bought one for a present for one of her carers. When the boys were younger I asked them if they wanted Easter eggs or money they agreed in a flash the money I just wish my mum would have gave me the choice because I would have snapped up the offer of cash. Easter Sunday was not about chocolate Church was on the cards with it being about celebrating the resurrection of Christ and standing room only in our little church.

Kids enjoy Easter maybe it’s the chocolate or the two week holiday as a kid I think for me it was the chocolate until one year I ate so much chocolate it was dribbling out of my nose. After that, I became less of a fan of the chocolate egg but mum would still buy them until I just grew out of receiving the aforementioned eggs.

Being a lapsed catholic church is not part of my Easter but I still remember the significances of the whole celebration of Jesus and in a smaller way still part of my life. I just don’t believe you need to sit in a church and who knows one day I may go back and take up my seat again.

Gold Rush: Parker’s Trail – Discovery Channel – TV Review

Gold Rush: Parker’s Trail was back last night and will take Parker Schnabel and right hand man Rick Ness to Guyana, South America. They were accompanied by wilderness guide Karla Ann to help keep them safe in the dangerous jungle even if she has never been to the jungle and behind the camera is Sam Brown a friend of Parker from the first three Gold Rush seasons.

Guyana was the scene of Parkers mining rival Todd Hoffman’s biggest Gold Rush failure where he found next to no gold in a country now reported to be worth $750m in gold a year and they wound up mining for diamonds, which was just as bad a payday. Where the Hoffman crew when all out using the same type of big machinery they used for mining in Alaska, Schnabel will be listening and studying the local miners to find the gold.

If it is, a competition between the two Parker doesn’t need to find much goal as Todd and his crew wound up with 2 ounces after their Guyana stint.

In this opening episode we saw Parker and his small team building up to the trip and a Guyana miner explained about mining the area and how there was many creatures that could kill you in the jungle, a lot. Turning up at the Guyana capital, they were without Ness who eventually turned up so the team were together again but Rick and Parker need to have a chat first.

Parker receives a shock! Ness who is Parkers right hand man is leaving his crew and going to run his own claim. With Hoffman throwing in goldmining for a career in music, could the Gold Rush bosses be giving Parker a new rival in season nine?

To find a virgin gold claim, Parker's crew will fight their way through dense and dangerous jungle where they'll encounter lethal predators like ravenous caiman and jaguars along with venomous snakes and spiders the size of softballs. Even the piranha they fish for can kill them with their razor-sharp teeth.

Parker will need to learn all new ways of mining how to handle the dangerous high-pressure hoses. But that's only the beginning. The risk becomes even greater as they head deep into the unknown -- crossing raging rapids and overcoming treacherous waterfalls to reach the near-legendary "Mountain of Gold”.

But what they encounter on the last leg of their journey was something they could not have expected. Could this be the biggest pay out in Parker's illustrious mining career? Or could the journey to "El Dorado" prove to be tougher than he ever imagined?

Discovery Channel Tuesday’s 9pm

The Blockhouse (1973) – Film Review

I found a gem of a film today not on YouTube this time but on Dailymotion which is very much the same. It was another film I had never seen and according to my research never received a UK release. The Blockhouse (1973) could be a possible true story although at the end of the film it is claimed to be a factual tail.

It is reportedly a true story of six German soldiers, two of whom survived trapped in a storehouse in Poland for 6 years. Four of those years in total darkness.

In the film, the story was changed from German soldiers to forced labourers. Seven men forced by the Nazis to work as labourers on Normandy coastal defences but today is D Day and as the coastal bombardment begins run for cover. They run into a nearby shelter where they end up entombed deep beneath the ground in a storehouse filled with wine and food. Initially overjoyed to be alive and free of the Nazis they soon realise that they are stuck in this cellar with little chance of discovery, which becomes to feel like a claustrophobic prison where they have little to do except die slowly from boredom.

We basically experience how these men dealt with being in this storehouse prison. We see how one of the men works out a way for them to measure time by counting his heartbeats and watching a candle burn. We see another trying to break through a sealed duct, something one thinks is foolish whilst another understands he has nothing else to do. We also see how one expects the Germans to come and rescue them whilst with no daylight people's body clocks quickly are messed up and they lose track of days. But of course, we see how tension between them builds as the claustrophobic nature causes some to go stir crazy.

Peter Sellers gives an outstanding performance of a person dealing with isolation, desperation, death, and lost loved ones and it was one of a very few straight acting roles given my Sellers.

My Rating

Sunday Crush - Eva Green – French Movie Beauty

You rarely see Eva Green on the red carpet or in celebrity papers/magazines, which makes her a bit of a mystery and intriguing. I didn’t no she was French until I saw a written review of her third film Kingdom of Heaven (2005), where she first came to my notice.

Her first film, “The Dreamers” (2003), which I have yet to see involved extensive full frontal nude scenes and graphic sex scenes the film was described "disarmingly sweet and completely enchanting" and was generally well received. A bit strong for your first film. It was playing Sibylla Queen of Jerusalem was where I first saw her in film and I was immediately drawn to her sultry looks and her eyes just drew you in.

But for me her stepping into the OO7 franchise was the moment she entered my crush list in her role of Vesper Lynd in the James Bond film “Casino Royale” (2006). She plays a haughty treasury official, assigned to deliver stake money to James Bond for a high stake card game and watch over the government's money.

She is beautifully sensual and elegantly classy while being seductively sexy. That elegant black dress, that demure posture, that coy expression, that inviting bit of cleavage, and those expressive eyes gazing vaguely down – all evocatively inviting her admirers galore – to bask in her soft sensuality, indulge her every whim, and satisfy her every desire. Throughout the film, the clothes she wore looked like they were poured onto her body.

The scene stealing moment for me is after Bond tells Vesper she must turn the head of everyone at the card table, and she does, including mine and I wasn’t at the table. The purple dress reminded me of those movie stars from yesteryear elegant and oh yes she has a body for sin.

When a Ice Cream Van turned into something else

Has I when out my front door to put rubbish in the bin right outside my door was an ice cream van stuck in the traffic and like a flash, my mind was full of memories. I loved Ice Cream has a kid; it was my favourite thing about the summer.

You would hope for a warm spring hopefully so the ice cream van would be dragged out of winter storage early. Has a kid soon as you heard the tell-tale music I would dart straight in and start pestering mum for money for an ice cream. I always preferred ice cream to ice-lollies and still do today.

It was a case at nine times out of ten mum would give in to the pestering giving me money for a medium but not enough for my favourite a 99 with the chocolate flake. We had two regular vans calling in our street the standard Mr Whippy and an independent ice cream seller. When I could afford it, I just loved an oyster shell ice cream and would lick around the edge until I could close the shells together and devour. On a nice summers day the ice cream from Mr Whippy was so soft it would quick melt and soon be dribbling down you cone onto your hand meaning you had to eat it quickly.

That’s why I would prefer the independent seller he use scoop ice cream on a cone but you had to be careful eating it or it could easily floor to the ground if you dive in. My way of dodging that disaster was to lick around the edge of the cone and ice cream to make a seal.

Until I started dating the wife an ice cream van was just that a seller of ice cream, lollies and sometimes crisps. But my girlfriend/future wife lived in Llanrumney where the ice cream van was a very different beast.

The van would stop right outside her house the driver was a mate of her brothers maybe a discount was on the cards but as I step to the window, I was in for a shock. From the outside, it looked like a normal van but inside it was like a corner shop. Bread, fags, tins of baked beans the list seemed endless I lost thought of an ice cream asked for an orange maid ice-lolly and picked up the Echo.

Then when I lived in the Leckwith area with wife and the kids there would be an ice cream van doing the rounds at 10:30pm what the hell I would think to myself. Even for me an ice cream that late was just too late so I left it alone. Then one night I fancied a treat or something and headed out of the house for the van but has I walked up the street there was a distinct smell of onions. My god all those night sitting home and I could have been eating hot dogs yes the ice cream van was selling hot dogs it was a mini version of the Llanrumney van selling household essentials from then on it was part of my life until one night it was no more it just disappeared.

We now live on a main road the ice cream van never stops anywhere near the house what a pity.

Must see TV - Week beginning 24 March 2018

It is somewhat sketchy my recommendations for the upcoming week has there isn’t much coming up new on the TV but what’s there is looking interesting. Next week I am really looking forward to viewing the return of Hospital on BBC 2 Monday has the last series was eye opening and lead to a major debate around the country. Come Tuesday my fascination with programming on the subject of finding gold will be fed by one of my favourite channels Discovery Channel.

Sunday 25 Mar –Sky Sports F1 Channel – F1 Australian Grand Prix 6am ***New***

F1 is back so more of the wheel goes around and I hope Mercedes and Hamilton lost their edge or the other teams have upped their game. After a disrupted winter test, the 2018 Formula 1 season starts with a sense that everyone is heading into one big unknown. There are a number of sleeping giants with a point to prove.

Will it be Lewis Hamilton or Sebastian Vettel that takes their fifth title this year? On the other hand, could it be one of the Red Bulls of Max Verstappen or Daniel Ricciardo? Alternatively, perhaps Valtteri Bottas could spring a surprise it will be a long season.

Sunday 25 Mar – Yesterday - We Have Been Watching 7pm ***New series***

Comedians and comedy actors, including David Baddiel, Richard Herring, Meera Syal, and Josie Lawrence, gather for a night in front of the TV, watching clips from classic sitcoms and sketch shows both old and new. They provide fresh insight, smart observations, and hilarious anecdotes to the shows we have loved over the last 50 years.

Monday 26 Mar - BBC2 - Hospital 9pm ***New Series***

Return of the documentary showing the day-to-day realities the NHS faces in unprecedented times, this time following life at the Nottingham University Hospitals trust to show the impact of ever-increasing demands on the health service. Cameras show the decisions that have to be made every day by consultants, surgeons and managers at Queen's Medical Centre and City Hospital, and the impact these choices have on patients

Tuesday 27 Mar – Discovery Channel - Gold Rush: Parker's Trail 9pm ***New Series***

Miner Parker Schnabel underwent the ultimate test to see if he can match his ancestors who tried to make it rich on the Klondike Gold Rush Trail. In the first series, Parker and Rick Ness attempt the Klondike trail over the Chilkoot Pass and up the Yukon River to Dawson City the heart of the 1897 Klondike Gold Rush.

In this new series, he set in Guyana in South America in search of gold. However, the pay-off may be more promising but so are the limits of his team’s mental and physical endurance, not to mention their teamwork skills.

Tuesday 27 Mar – Discovery Channel – Gold Rush White Water 10pm ***New Series***

Dakota Fred and his son Dustin are down on their luck. But the ‘Dakota Boys’ aren’t quitters. They have one last roll of the dice.

In this all-new series, the Dakota Boys put together a team of intrepid divers, mountaineers and bush mechanics to go where no miner has ever managed to explore – the depths of freezing plunge pools in white water rapids that have only recently become accessible. Nothing will stop these guys – they’ll dive in raging torrents with a six-inch suction dredge where one wrong move could have deadly consequences.

Thursday 29 Mar – Channel 5 – Can’t Pay. We’ll Take It Away 9pm ***New Series***

Gary and Cona are in west London on a bid to recover £1,800 in unpaid parking fines. However, the debtor is unable to pay and reveals her ex-partner was responsible for the tickets. In Birmingham, Matt and Garry have a writ for nearly £40,000 owed by a grandmother for solicitor's fees and try to get back more than £6,500 owed to a nursery for childcare.

Thursday 29 Mar – National Geographic – Wicked Tuna 9pm ***New Series***

The new season finds the captains in need of redemption. Beverly resident Capt. Dave Marciano of the Hard Merchandise is out to turn things around after a disappointing season in Gloucester last year, in which he caught only five fish. Over on the Hot Tuna, Capt. TJ Ott had a dismal season in the Outer Banks. Meanwhile, Capt. Tyler McLaughlin of the Pinwheel is armed with a new boat and a skilled mate.

Last season’s champion, Capt. Dave Carraro of the FV-Tuna.com, who has claimed the top spot four times in the past six years, is confident he can repeat that success again this year.

The boats are all based or land their catch in Gloucester.

Thursday 29 Mar – Sky 1 – In the Long Run 10pm ***New Series***

Idris Elba stalks out of his flat with a gun in his grip, intent on sorting out a problem with his neighbour. Yet while we’re used to Elba glowering in crime dramas, here he’s playing a gentle family man. It’s a silicone gun and he’s gone to fix his neighbour’s leaking bath.

This good-natured comedy is based on Elba’s recollections of growing up in 1980s Hackney, and he plays Walter, who emigrated from Sierra Leone 13 years ago and lives with his wife Agnes and son Kobna on a London estate. The family’s quiet routine is disrupted by the arrival of Walter’s charismatic, fun-loving brother Valentine.

Friday 30 Mar – BBC2 – Episodes 10pm ***New Series***

At the end of the last season actor Matt LeBlanc playing himself is down on his luck and in need of money be littles himself by taking on a job of presenting a game show. Now several months have passed and Matt's show The Box is now a runaway hit.

Unfortunately, for Matt, this means that he must have daily contact with his producer Merc Lapidus and, if anything, the animosity between the two only got worse. As Matt is the star of the show, he should have some advantage over Merc, but he makes a decision that puts him right in the palm of his producer's sweaty hand.

Happy Birthday to me ..... shut it

Woke up this morning to my birthday and I am not a birthday kind of person just another day to me. I am not really a fan of cards, parties, just give me cash and some Birthday wishes on social media, and I am happy.

Even as a kid I never was one for birthdays well I mean it is just another number tagged on to me, today Peter is 58 another year off my life card with the count down to the finishing line getting closer. Also, I am a year closer to my free bus pass that excites me.

I am sitting here looking at my cards, I know I do not like them or want them but I do get them all the same and all I am thinking I would have rather had the money. I reckon there is a few quid standing there and tomorrow they will be in the recycle bin.

I hate my birthday so much I have no special memory of any of them and I never had a party or anything but do not cry for me because I could not give a toss. Back then, the best idea was to keep quiet about your birthday so you didn’t get the bumps. A cake would be a waste of time unless it was Madeira the only cake I like and by the way bin any candles they would be a waste of time and I hate there smell. With no liking for birthdays, I would swerve most party invitations from friends unless it was in a pub with a small group.

Tonight I am doing away with a longstanding tradition where we normally have a Chinese takeaway for Daddy on this birthday but it’s everyone’s birthday really because I could never sit there eating a Chinese on my own. So everyone eats and it’s my birthday and I pay! Something wrong there. However, we had a curry only a few days ago be it a homemade curry so another a few days later is not on is it. However, I have a feeling my mind will be changed later and the tradition will be back on. So curry, egg fried rice and chips a thing of beauty could be back on the menu.

I have mentioned my age above but it is still just a number I do not feel. Maybe I will feel different come 60 but today it doesn’t scare me. I can look back on my 58 years, which has been interesting but for a few changes I would make there is nothing major I would change.

I was a grumpy kid, teenager, and so on today I can still be a grumpy old man if I want its been in my DNA all my life mum called me moody or a moaning minnie. I can be up for a laugh in fact I can play the fool quite well in the right environment, a pub, or a non-Birthday party with a pint in my hand.

The Babysitter (2017) - Film Review - Netflix Original

I mentioned that I have now acquired Netflix a few weeks ago and earlier I decided to check out the films and immediately “The Babysitter” caught my eye. It was described as a horror/comedy good some blood and a laugh hopefully I was up for that.

The film was classed a Netflix Original so I am not sure if it had a cinema run or just release to Netflix. A great Horror Comedy is a rare thing and “The Babysitter” can join that short list with pride, as it's the most fun I’d had watching a film in this genre all year and maybe last year to.

The movie starts with Cole (Judah Lewis), a twelve- year-old boy who is afraid of everything, constantly bullied, and completely oblivious to the fact that the girl down the street Melanie (Emily Alyn Lind) has a crush on him. Cole has a crush of his own, on his babysitter Bee (Samara Weaving). Why should he care about being too old to still need a babysitter when his parents want some time out of the house, when his sitter's this hot and this cool?

Then things take a really dark turn when Melanie urges Cole a sneaks out of bed and spy on Bee who she tells is probably having sex with her boyfriend. Bee tries to drug Cole to keep him out of the way but he works it out and pours the drink away. On sneaking to the top of the stairs, he catches her playing a game of Truth or Dare and Bee kisses to the jock Max (Robbie Amell), Goth Sonya (Hana Mae Lee), and class clown John (Andrew Bachelor), and a long, passionate one to cheerleader Allison (Bella Thorne). She then makes out with Allison’s dorky boyfriend Samuel (Doug Haley) who looks well out of place among this group and we soon discovers why . . . has she knifes him in the head and collects his blood.

Turns out Bee has promised her friends she can make all of their dreams come true if they participate in a satanic ritual she knows. The ritual also involves taking a few harmless drops of blood from Cole, but when they find out Coles awake and works out he as seen everything, they won't settle for that.

The stock characters that would have been helplessly butchered in 80's horror movies are the monsters here, but they're also still victims. As Cole faces his fears and makes them chase him around his house, they each end up meeting a gory demise one by one. Never mind the times where Cole gets outside of the house and then runs right back in, just for the sake of continuing their deadly game of tag for the sake of there being a movie.

Robbie Amell is a surprising standout. Very amiable for being both a dumb jock and a psycho killer, Max takes the occasional break from the chase to try to play big brother to Cole, mentoring him on how to stand up for himself before resuming trying to kill him. But it's really Judah Lewis and Samara Weaving's show. With all the time invested into getting to know them at the beginning of the movie, they manage to make you believe, or at least want to believe, that there's still genuine affection between the babysitter and her charge, even after she's set her friends on hunting him down. As a result, the inevitable confrontation between them is actually quite poignant and touching.

There's plenty of comically over-the-top gore, but moments meant to be suspenseful are more eye-rolling that nail-biting, so if you're looking for something to make you scream and jump out of your chair, this may be the wrong movie for you. But if you're looking for a sly and silly send-up of films about nubile teens being massacred and one with plenty of heart beneath the gruesome exterior, you may find yourself falling in love.

My Rating

Cardiff Bay - The Taff - Water Playground (Updated)

I have always been fascinated by the tides on the River Taff as a kid I would sit on the riverbank and watch the tide rush in on a sunny day it was beautiful. The local paper would carry the time of the tides but after a while, you just knew when it was that time of the day. A tell tale sign the tide was coming in were ships entering or leaving the Docks or the Bowles sand boat waiting to come up the Taff to its berth.

I would sit and watch the water build up behind the rapids, we called them the rapids but they were nothing like the major rapids you see explorers navigate it was a trickle. Then again, we called the waterway from the old entrance of the Glamorganshire Canal the big Amazon and a large gully leading into it the little Amazon. We like to give things impressive names. When the tide was out, we would walk the tide line looking to see what goodies drifted down river. We were never short of a ball also the odd dead sheep.

There were two tides a day one every 12 hours one would come in when you were tucked up asleep in bed but in the summer, it was possible to catch both better if you were out camping. You would never get much sleep anyway when we camped out. 

The tide would refresh the River Taff and become busier as children playing around the water’s edge, fishing for fun not really caring if you were to catch something but it was nice to catch an eel or two. We swam in the Taff and back then it was not the cleanest river in the world and from time to time you would have a rash to cope with. Rafts were a fun distraction you would have to seek out building material and then build it or you could be lucky and find someone had discarded their raft. If you felt less energetic and it was a sunny day you could just sit on the riverbank throwing the odd stone into the water and just chatting with a friend or friends.

No big brother authority over looking us as long as we stayed within the law of course which was not always possible. We lit fires melted lead to make fishing weights among other things jumping gullies it was fun. 

It has all gone now, the big and little Amazon are under the waters of the new-fangled Cardiff Bay along with the rest of my memories. No tide just a bay and the smell of the mud as gone. The Cardiff Bay project has certainly change the River Taff right up to Bute Park. There is a completely new life to the river for the better in my book with the water in a better condition and there are more activities on the water.

You can catch a waterbus from Cardiff Bay to Bute Park and back as you have party boats or booze cruise on the river. You can also take a boat over to the island of Flat Home in the Bristol Channel. On a nice day a walk over the Barrage on one side, you have Cardiff Bay on the other side the Bristol Channel the café has been up graded and I am looking forward to see it when the weather warms up.

There has been an increase in wildlife in and out of the water when I took a trip on the waterbus I cannot believe how many swans were on the river and bay.

Nazis at the Centre of the Earth (2012) - Film Review

A bit of a strange one, I must say but after seeing the films trailer, I was intrigue to seek the film out to watch. When I saw the title of the film, I was not sure what to expect as other films bearing the same title has people enter some tunnel via a volcano looking for the centre of the earth but the trailer looked oh so different. The plot is ridiculous, the acting is terrible, the special effects are a joke, and still it was a good watch.

As far-fetched as the premise of Antarctic researchers being captured by decaying Nazi soldiers living in a pristine valley deep within the earth, much of what occurs during the first 55 minutes teeters closely to the territory often described as torture porn. The set-up may be silly, but what happens to some of these researchers is quite grisly and disturbing: flesh peeling, gory human experimentation, Nazi zombie shower rape, and even a forced abortion.

The film opens in 1945 with the diabolical Nazi mad scientist Dr. Josef Mengele and a handful of Nazis making a narrow escape from Allied Forces as they board a plane with a cylindrical device. Mengele proves to be a better shot than any Nazi in any movie I have ever seen, single-handedly taking out a tank, several soldiers, and even slashing a throat with a scalpel before the plane gets airborne.

Flash-forward to modern times when some Antarctic researchers drilling into the ice hit something metal. That something metal has a swastika on it. Then two of the scientists are captured by some Nazi Stormtroopers who are wearing gas masks who take them down deep into the earth. There they come face to face with Dr. Mengele who for the fun of it rips off one of their faces and the other is given the option of either assisting him or face the same fate but she quickly agrees.

The rest of the scientific team go in search of their missing colleagues. Despite the trail sending them further and further underground, no matter how far they climb or slide, nobody really ever expresses much concern over how exactly they intend to get back up to the surface. They soon find themselves in the much-fabled world-within-a-world, a hollow earth paradise deep beneath the Antarctic ice. Unfortunately, this Shangri-La is home to the last remnants of the Third Reich preparing to unleash a Fourth Reich.

Surrounded by zombified S.S. soldiers in uniform, some with blackened skin looking like they suffer from full body frostbite, others with hideous scars from recent flesh transplants that haven’t fully healed. Mengele gives them the same option as their colleague to die or work for him. The only Jew in the group doesn’t get an option he is vaporized on the spot.

Much of the movie early on is quite mean-spirited and fairly brutal; at the same time, it really is hard to take any of it seriously, because the premise is so out there to begin with and some of the plot twists are nothing short of hysterical. You got hollow earth, Nazi zombies, mad scientist experiments, people being skinned alive, Nazi zombie gangbangs, flesh-eating bacteria, disintegration ray gun shootouts, a gigantic freedom-crushing Nazi UFO.

Where would Mengele be without his boss? Well Adolf Hitler is there all jazzy up in a robot dreaming of the Fourth Reich and looking for some pay back on the USA. His plans involves a biological attack by way of releasing flesh-eating bacteria above the major cities. This of course leads into a battle between the U.S. Air Force and a UFO over Antarctica, but as to be expected, the fighter jets are no match for this Doomsday Machine and it's up to our escaped heroes to take it down from the inside

But you know what? Dark and brooding one minute, laugh out loud ludicrous the next, pacing that goes from methodical to madcap in the blink of an eye, blood, boobs, and even a biomechanical beast, such are the makings of your quintessential worthy film. On that dark, violent, and nuttier than a fruitcake level, it certainly entertains. It doesn’t always work, but somehow it works. You know what I’m saying. If you do, this movie is for you.

My film rating