After watching some American lightweight horror, I decided to check my films I had saved on my virgin box and there was a lot to choose from and hit the jackpot with some classic British comedy in the shape of Two-Way Stretch (1960).
Three inmates run their prison cell like a hotel mainly because of a friendly guard, Chief P.O. Jenkins. Their cell door is always unlocked, they have a cat, the milkman delivers food and the morning papers through their window via a basket and a long rope, and they have several comforts of home including a stove to cook all that food.
Unfortunately a new prison officer arrives, in the form of the brilliant Lionel Jeffries Prison Officer Sidney 'Sour' Crout, disciplinarian who is reputed to be “The most evil twisted screw that ever crept down a prison corridor". Horrified by the cushy set up he soon stamps his authority on the situation even opening the old rock quarry. Really, he has it in for Peter Sellers (Dodger Lane), and his cellmates David Lodge (Jelly Knight) and Bernard Cribbins (Lennie Price).
Caught trying to rob a bank got them in prison with only one member of the gang, Soapy Stevens (Wilfred Hyde-White) had an alibi and was never caught. He re-emerges (Stevens) as a vicar looking to visit three members of his parish before their release Lane, Knight and Price who are not happy to see him.
He (Stevens) has a plan for the perfect robbery with the perfect alibi for the three of them this time not him. All they have to do is escape from prison and return by morning. They’re due to be released in a few days so who would suspect them. The target a visiting Sultan coming to London to have his weight compared to a sack of diamonds. They’re worth two million quid. Lane tells his partners Jelly and Price it’s one million only little trust between thieves. The Army is escorting the diamonds.
The diamond heist goes well and the three break back into prison, hiding the proceeds in the Governor's office. When they 'officially' leave prison, they manage to take the loot with them. All goes well, until the sack of diamonds is lost on a train. Stevens is recognised and arrested, but the others get away - minus the diamonds.
There are other good performances Irene Handl as Mrs Price, Lennie’s mum who berates him for not escaping enough like other members of the family. Liz Fraser as Ethel is Dodger’s girlfriend who just wants to settle down.
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